Our cruise is in a month exactly from today!!
I'm waaaaay more freaked out then I thought I would be as it grows nearer. I'm freaked out about leaving my favorite kids SO DARN LONG, I'm freaked out about crashing in a airplane and never seeing said favorite kids again, or sinking in the boat with the same conclusion, or missing the boat...that would be bad, $3,000 in the trash can. But at least there is no dieing involved in that option. Definitely preferably.
So those are the big ones, but also, I'm freaking out because I realized I am going to be in a swimsuit A LOT on this trip. Gross. Have you seen me in the last 2 years? In a swimsuit? Help.
I don't want any of that terrible stuff to happen. Who would?
So...
***We got Life Insurance. That really does give you peace of mind. It's odd, but wonderful.***
***We are going to write a will. The cheap way, you just write it and take it to the bank and "notarize" and "witness" it. That will be nice; then, if we die in any of the above scenarios, our favorite kids will have a plan, AND money. And so will their care-takers. phew.***
***I've decided to make a paper chain for Jax when we leave, to help him try to understand the time frame. This idea helps me only slightly...I'll miss those kids so much.
As far as the swimsuit sadness:
***We are going to do a "raw smoothie cleanse" for 5 days. Hoping to drop a few pounds with that. Also I am on a new "diet" where I only eat raw foods for breakfast and lunch and then eat a normal dinner. But NO desserts or sweets.
What?? Who's idea was this?? Do you know me? Who am I??
My new "diet" is to prep me for the "cleanse". I've been doing said diet for 2 days now. My goal was 3 days. :) (give me a break, we are going to St. George to watch my dad do the Senior Games tomorrow so I didn't want to have to keep up such a weird diet on the road and on "vacation". I'm hard core like that.)
Conclusion from the last "***": It's a good thing we got Life Insurance, because, I might die. This whole "diet" thing, it's a slow death. I'm so hooked on sweets, I think I'm going through a severe withdrawal.
It might kill me. Or my favorite kids. Or my favorite kids through me.
I don't know if its this terrible death diet and it's results on my nerves or if my kids really have just suddenly decided to riot, crazy style. Coincidence? I think not. This diet is NOT kid friendly.
I'm suddenly, after today, having seriously doubts about the "cleanse". The theory behind it is SO GOOD. I want to "reset my body". I really would love to be able to do it. But I don't know if I'll be able to. Not if I have to do it and have get to be at home with my "lively", "energetic", "independently dependent", and frankly volatile BEAUTIFUL children. I don't think I have it in me. I can't even do 3 days of a "diet" without loosing it. And I'm supposed to do a CLEANSE?? I don't want to be a crazy-mean mom (more than I already am...) My kids deserve better. I think I'm going to take a stand.
New idea: The way I'm figuring it is: I made my bed (15lbs later) and now I have to sleep in it. And everyone on the cruise is going to have to visually suffer because of my big fat bed. Hopefully my "bed" doesn't embarrass Justin. But hey, he made his bed when he married me.
Plus, he likes my bed. :)
I'm glad I talked this out, I'm bagging that sweet-awesome cleanse, gosh darn'it. I'll do it when the kids are grown. Or in school. Or when I have nerves of steel. Or never.
Still LOVE the idea though, feel free to do it and tell me about it.
Hahahahahahaha! I think you look awesome all the time because of your confidence! Scott went on a raw food diet for 30 days when I was pregnant with Viviane and it made me so made at him. But he lost like 20 pounds, but he has Amazing self-control. He was even fixing the kids dinner and stuff. He also fasted, only water, for 5 days. That was terrible for me also :). I think a better way to approach this is to think what you would tell your daughters (hypothetical) about their bodies and how you genuinely feel about how wonderful they are. Katie is already asking me if she is fat. At least 6 or 7 times already. I want my girls to realize that while their bodies are a great gift from God, that doesn't define who they are or what their worth is, and that being strong and healthy to do all the things they want, is the goal, not a specific size. I would hope while you are on your vacation that you would not waste any time being self-conscious, when you are just so lovely and strong (I am jealous about the whole running thing). Plus making food you CAN'T eat to feed to children who WON'T east is one of the most frustrating things ever. Stopping that will probably improve your relationship immediately :). Don't forget your camera when you go on your cruise!!! Or to take pictures!!!! :)
ReplyDeletethat was such an awesome post.. brings back memories of college... forget that diet... just moderation.. i have a sweet tooth too.. its awesome but sucks at the same time... lol... Justin loves you for who you are, you are beautiful and you will have a great time on your cruise..
ReplyDeletetawn, i have NEVER seen you look less than amazing, ever. even in a swimsuit.
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